It's like. Having someone come over. And. Kick you in the stomach. You can't breathe. Can't move. Can't even think. So. You just sit back. And. Watch it happen. There's nothing you can do. And. If there was. You probably wouldn't feel like doing it. So. You're forced to watch. Because. You can't turn your head. Because. It feels restrained. And. Your eyelids are nonexistent. Even looking away won't work. Because. Everywhere you look. It's there. Then. You feel. Cold. And. Hopeless. And. Helpless. And. Empty. And. Blank. And. An overwhelming feeling of despair. And. You don't know what to do anymore. Because. You just don't. Nothing is the way it should be. And. You get what you get. Not what you expect. The stuff you used to fall back on. Turns it back on you. Because. You turned your back on it. So. You feel so alone. You can't even say. You're just one person. Or. It could be worse. It's like complaining about not having shoes. When. Someone else doesn't even have feet. And. You keep getting knocked down. And. Managing to get up. But. Sometimes. Quitting seems like the only option. And. It's like a backwards world. Little things seem like crisis. And. Major stuff. Just makes you want to stop caring. Nothing seems to have meaning. And. Daily activities. Are just going through the motions. Sad. Scared. Incomplete.
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