Messing With Prefection.

You know how old people complain about. Old songs getting sampled. Or remixed? Dude. That's how I felt when I heard that song by. Double L C Double O L J. And. J L O. I mean. I know he's a phenomenon. And. His hand is like a shark's fin. But. Why did he have to tamper with Afrika Bambaataa. He must have been looking for the prefect beat. But. He messed it up. Soul. Sonic. Force. G. L. O. B. E. Also. I'm fairly confident the N.O.T.O.R.I.O.U.S. big. would not dew a duet with Nelly. Fairly confident. The shiny suit man would. But. Not Mr. Wallace. So. Not only was it sampled from Grandmaster Flash. Then. Diddificated. For use by Biggie. Then. Re Diddifficated. So. Diddied to the turd degree. But. Then. He has to put your mom's favorite rapper Nelly on there. And. It's not the Tip Drill Nelly. It's the Nelly that would be with. One third of Destiny's child. Not the one with the thighs. The other one. But. Yeah. Then. Pall Waul. Is on there too. He's not that bad. Except. He keeps talking about rabbits. Karats. And. Bugs Bunny. But. The part that makes it worse is. Jazzy Phae. Make it. Jazzy a word that rhymes with Phae. So. There's two people rambling in the background. The only way it could be worse is if they got. Jermaine Dupree on it. With. DJ Clue doing a remix. Yep. That would solidly make me hate that song more than it can be hated by one person. Lastly. How is ten people on a song a duet. There's no way that would go out to his Brooklyn Crew.

There was this girl. She reminded me of... A fusion of the. Winnie Cooper. And. Deana from salute your shorts. And. A lil bit of Kristin Kreuk. Ya heard?

Chapelle season 2. When you know the back story. It's more intriguing.

Dave. Remember the time you fell asleep in study hall. And. You had your head on it. Then. I kicked the desk.

LK. Said. I should do seperate television posts. Or. Movie posts. I forget which. But. Here's a television post. Everyone says. Oh man. There should be a filtering process. Because. People can't sing. I think that's the point though. So. They can find like. The everyday Joe Schmo. And. Idle eyes them. I was also wondering. If there was someone who looked like a mutant. But. Could sing. If they'd make the cut. Probably. The first round at least. Also. Would they do a crazy go nuts makeover for that person also? What else. OH yeah. I remember. When they're looking for undiscovered talent. I think the best bet is younglings. Because. If this show is like. In it's 10th episode. That means. The sixteen year olds. Were like. 2. When the show first started. So. That's where they've been hiding all along. As for older undiscovered talent. Either. They were trying to perfect there art. Or. They probably had obligations. Maybe they started a new career. And. Didn't accrue enough days to get a full day off. And. There's no way they could drive 200 miles to make it to an audition. I'm just saying. Those are two completely legitimate points. Before I thought of this. I was saying. They should have done a sweep of the nation by now. Think about it.

Let's see a few things.

First. And. Four most. I'd like to thank Mary Jane Watson. Also. Known as. Mary Jane Watson Parker. Also. Known as. Skelley. Also. Known as Skeletor. Ok. Not Skeletor. But. Anyway. I'd like to thank her for sending me the freshest swingline stapler known to man. Now. I have something that can handle the capacity of things I have to staple on a daily basis. I'm not going to use it yet. It's not nrfb. But. It's still in mint condition. I'm not going to use it. Until I get the official Swingline. By the way. It's burgundy. Not red. But. I'm not complaining. Thank you Skelley.

That stapler is my transition into a work story. Or. Two stories.

A. I dunno how the conversation progressed to this. But. My OM. Said something. About. Papers blowing off the desk. Under the door. Into the hallway. Out the front door. Into the parking lot. Then. He said. Nothing but net. And. I said. Ok.

Warning this was funny when I said it. But. It's probably not as funny now. But. I said.

Since we're accountants. Don't you mean. Nothing but gross?

Yeah. I know it's pretty bad. But. Seriously. It was funny when I first said it. Then. He goes. ... Nope. I think it's still net.

I would say you had to be there. But. Then it would sound like. Something super cool happened. So. I'll just say. If it was a sitcom with a laugh track. That probably would have gotten a chuckle.

3. There is not a way to lock the door from the inside. It has to be locked from the outside. So. I suggested if you wanted to fall asleep. You could stand in front of the door. And. Lean on it. Then. If someone were to come in the office. If they knocked first. And. Then. Opened the door. It should startle you enough to wake up. And. Play off the fact like you were just leaving. Because. They would think they accidentally opened it up on you. But. My OM says. Well. What if they don't knock. And. They come flying in? Then. I said. You'd probably get thrown on the ground. And. Then. Play off like they bumped into you from that point. Then. I said. If you were sound asleep. And. It happened. Then. They'd probably think they just knocked you unconscious. And. When. You woke up. It would be like you being un unconscioused.

Lastly. If you know me. You'll know I don't sing the write words to songs. For some reason. I said to myself. My name is who. My name is what. Chicka. Chicka. Mike Jones. Guess you had to be there.

On the back of checks. Why do they have that area blocked off where you're not allowed to write? Like. You have that limited real estate where any. And. All notations have to go. It makes me wonder what's so special about that area? Or is the bank just jerks. And. Not only want your money. But. As much of your check as possible. And. If that's the case. It kinda makes you want to write a check to yourself. And. Write all over that no man's land. Or. Write in highlighter. So. When they're doing the crazy black light antics like it's CSI. Then they can see you're a rebel. Also. With all the microprinting on the checks. Why do they need that gigantic area? Like seventy five percent of it. And. What if I have letters that hang below the line. After I wrote that. I just realized. I don't have any letters that hang. Take take that. Roger. Preston. Buqq Buqq. And. Yancey.

Also. Why is it when people describe themselves. They're all like. I'm so. And. So. And. I love to have fun. I've never heard someone go. I'm so. And. So. And. I like to be bored out of my mind. All the friggin time. Non stop. So. If you're looking to get into something not exciting. Call me up.